During these times, one common issue that couples fight about is their children’s learning environment but there are ways to resolve the conflicts.
During these times, one common issue that couples fight about is their children’s learning environment. Such disagreement happens especially to divorced parents who are struggling with co-parenting. Arguments may happen if both parents can’t agree if their children should still continue e-learning, or just return to school physically.
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So, how can we resolve such fights?
Sit Down And Lay Out Your Priorities
What are the main points that you want to discuss with your partner? And similarly, what does your partner want to talk about? Set a specific schedule to talk with your partner, and list everything down.
And more importantly, highlight the main issues where you and your partner would clash, along with your priorities. By doing this, you can get both of your thoughts properly organized and communicated, which can help both of you see the whole picture in a better way.
Ask What Your Child Wants
Have you consulted your children about what they want? Sometimes, when parents are too busy arguing about their children’s welfare, they forget that they can consult them, too. When discussing the school, don’t forget to involve your kids. Ask them about what they think. Never underestimate the power of their opinion, and consider what they feel.
Remember, their educational set up right now is about them and not about you or your partner. So, it’s just right that you consult them and ask them if they’re fine with their current learning setup, given the pandemic situation.
Research On The School District’s Safety Precautions
What does your state mandate, right now? Are there a lot of rising COVID-19 cases? Did your children’s school experience an outbreak of cases? Do your children need to join after-school activities?
These are some issues and news reports that you and your partner have to consider, as well. It is important that both of you weigh the current medical situation in your area, so you can assess the risk of letting your children physically go back to school.
If your kids’ school still wants to conduct classes online, then right now, you and your partner don’t have the choice but to stick to e-learning. On the other hand, if the school announces that they can already welcome students back, then you might need to research and assess if the school’s safety precautions are enough. Otherwise, it may be too risky.
Be involved and talk to your children’s teachers. What is the school’s guidelines when it comes to hygiene? How would their management implement social distancing among the students? How often would they clean every nook and cranny? These are some of the questions you might need to ask.
Work On A Compromise
After you’ve sat down, laid out your plans and priorities, and done some research, it’s time to discuss as a family what an optimal compromise is. Talk with your spouse and your children, and assess the pandemic situation together. Is it really safe to physically go back to school and return to our normal, pre-pandemic routines?
Weigh all the pros and cons together, and create an agreed-upon plan that is feasible, safe, and considerate of what your children needs. Make a timeline for the next 6 months that can help you estimate the possible risks that your family may face if the school reopens and physical classes are back. Try to come up with contingency plans as well, to help curb everyone’s anxiety.
Consult A Divorce Lawyer
For divorced or separated parents who struggle with co-parenting during the pandemic, resorting to their lawyers may be the best option to manage themselves. And if the situation is already full of doom and gloom, the couple may need to take their case to court.
Tiffany Hughes, family attorney and founder of The Law Office of Tiffany M. Hughes says that parents need to be mindful of their heated discussions. “Parents should never be having heated discussions around or in earshot of their child as this is entirely inappropriate and only serves to emotionally harm the child,” she said in an interview with Moms.com. “If parents are not in agreement as to the educational environment of their child, the parents need to discuss this on their own so the child does not feel that their e-learning is a source of negativity or anger for either of their parents.”
Going to court could help arguing couples settle any co-parenting issues that arose because of the shifts in the children’s learning environments. An officer of the court may step in to weigh the family’s situation, and give advice as to how such conflicts can be resolved.
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Sources: NY Times, Psychology Today, Journal of Educational Technology Systems, The Law Office of Tiffany Hughes
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