#parent | #kids | 6 Superheroes Who Could Totally Save Us From Covid-19

A man wearing a face mask walking past a mural of Wonder Woman. (Jesus Merida / LightRocket via Getty Images)

Nobody is coming to save us from the coronavirus or the deaths the incompetent Trump administration has caused. Ultraviolet light, bleach, and hydroxychloroquine are not cures. Even when there is a vaccine, distributing it will take months, if not years. In the meantime, the Republican misinformation machine has insured that a dedicated minority of Americans will resist all attempts to take basic precautions to protect the health and safety of our society. We are doomed by our leadership and ignorance to face more cases and more deaths from this disease than any other country on Earth.

I don’t know about you, but I can only stare into the abyss of our reality for so long until my mind retreats into fantasy. Nobody is coming to save us, but what if somebody could? Who could get us out of this mess that’s largely of our own making, and how? When I was a kid, I used to hide in comic books and sci-fi novels to avoid realities I couldn’t face head-on, like my parents’ crumbling marriage. That’s probably why I’m saving season two of The Umbrella Academy for the Republican National Convention week.

The upshot of my form of “self-care” is that I’ve come up with a list of superheroes who could actually help us fight the coronavirus and set our country back on the right track. Dr. Anthony Fauci can’t stop Trump from lying, but what if Fauci were bitten by a radioactive spider? Would that help? These are the questions I ask when Trump is allowed to talk on television without a fact-checker.

I’ve limited my list to six characters from the Marvel and D.C. comics universes, because the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are just silly. And because I am progressive, Batman and Iron Man do not make my list. We do not need a militarized overreaction to our problems. We do not need more punching. Besides, we already know how Bruce Wayne or Tony Stark would react to our current crisis, because Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerberg, Jeff Bezos, and Bill Gates already exist in real life. They don’t help. Instead, they use their wealth and technical wizardry to monopolize their industries and squeeze ever higher profit margins out of their workers. Sorry, wealthy ninjas. This is my fantasy, and the “due process is for wimps” crowd is not invited.

Here are the superheroes I’ve been turning to in my hours of dread.

Superhero #6: Scott Lang/Ant-Man

Donald Trump says we’re fighting an “invisible” virus, but that is wrong. It’s not invisible; it’s just very, very small. Ant-Man can make himself very small. Ant-Man is one of the only superheroes who can engage Covid-19 in hand-to-hand combat.

Unfortunately, each infected person contains millions of SARS-Cov-2 viruses, and Ant-Man is only one guy. Even if he had some way of fighting them all at the same time, he could only save one person at a time. He’s a case-by-case solution to a systemic problem: Deploying him is like arresting a bad police officer but doing nothing about the corrupt police force.


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