Switching nannies adjustment, parenting advice from Care and Feeding. | #parenting


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Dear Care and Feeding,

I am struggling with a really rough patch of separation anxiety with my 14-month-old. He’s a COVID baby, so he’s been home with me since birth and very attached. We’ve had a nanny since he was a few months old so that my husband and I can work from home, and it’s been going mostly fine. About six weeks ago, he started getting fussy in the morning when the nanny first arrived; still, he would be his happy self again once he had napped. But more recently, we had to change nannies, and it’s been a disaster. He’s cried from the moment she arrives until the moment she leaves each day—and I mean red-faced, top of his lungs, hysterical crying. I’m two floors up in my office and try to avoid coming down to intervene, but it’s so stressful for everyone involved. The new nanny has tried all his favorite things: music, food, walks. People always say that you just need to give a brief goodbye and calmly leave and they’ll be fine after a few minutes, and that used to be the case, but I now know this isn’t always true. Our new nanny seems good, but I wonder if it’s time to try someone else.

—Anxious Mom



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